What's
your listening style?
Do you focus more on the content of the message than on the
feelings being expressed by the speaker?
Or do you prefer brief sound bites of
information?
Your
listening style is your preferred way of making sense out
of the spoken messages you hear. Listeners tend to fall
into one of four listening styles: people -oriented,
action-oriented, content-oriented, or time-oriented.
People-Oriented Listeners
As
you might suspect from the label, people-oriented listeners tend to
be comfortable with and skilled at listening to people's
feelings and emotions. They are likely to empathize and
search for common areas of interest. People-oriented listeners
embody many of the attributes of being other-oriented; they seek
strong interpersonal connections when listening to
others.
Action-Oriented
Listeners
An
action-oriented listener prefers information that is well
organized, brief, and error-free. An action-oriented
listener doesn't like the speaker to tell lengthy stories and
digress.
The action-oriented listener may think, "Get to the point"
or "What am I supposed to do with all this information?"
when hearing a message filled with too many anecdotes or rambling,
disorganized bits of information.
Whereas a people-oriented listener would be more likely to focus on
the feelings of the person telling the story, the action-oriented
listeners wants to know the point or the punch
line. Rather than taking the information they hear at face
value, action-oriented listeners are more likely to reinterpret or
evaluate the literal message to determine whether it is true or
false.
Content-Oriented
Listeners
If
you are a content-oriented listener, you are more comfortable
listening to complex, detailed information than
are people with other listening styles. A content-oriented listener
hones in on the facts, details, and evidence in a message.
In fact, if a message does have ample supporting evidence and
specific details, the content-oriented listener is more likely to
reject the message. Like the action-oriented listener,
content-oriented listeners are also less apprehensive when
communicating with others in group and interpersonal
situations.
Content-oriented listeners would make good judges or lawyers; they
focus on issues and arguments and listen to see whether a
conclusion that a speaker reaches is accurate or
credible.
Time-Oriented Listeners
You're a
time-oriented listener if you like your messages delivered
succinctly. Time-oriented listeners are keenly aware of
how much time they have to listen. Their lives are filled with many
things on their "to do" list; their "in basket" often overflows, so
they want messages delivered quickly and briefly.
Whereas a people-oriented listener might enjoy spending time over a
cup of coffee catching up on the day's activities, a time-oriented
listener is more like a drive-by listener. A time-oriented listener
may think, "Give me what I need so I can keep on moving to my
next task or hear my next message," "Don't ramble, don't digress,
just get to the point quickly."
Knowing
your listening style can help you better understand how to adapt to
various listening situations.
If
for example, you know that you are a time-oriented or
action-oriented listener and your friend or companion is a
people-oriented listener, you and your friend will need to
adjust both your speaking and listening styles.
When speaking to an action-oriented listener, give the listener a
brief preview of what you will be talking about. You could say,
"Phil, there are three things I'd like to share with you."
Stick to that structure.
When speaking to a people-oriented listener, realize that he or she
will feel rushed or hurried if you skip information about feelings
or relationships. A people-oriented listener prefers to spend more
time talking about emotions than do those with other listening
styles. A time-oriented listener would like information summarized
like a crisply written business memo punctuated with bullets and
lists of essential information.
What is
the Best Listening Style?
It depends on the
listening situation and the communication context and objectives.
In a high-pressure, fact-paced job such as stock trading, you don't
have time to listen to stories about clients' families or the
latest TV show; you need information delivered quickly and
efficiently. A father, listening to a daughter talk about what a
rotten day at school she had, would find a people-oriented
listening style the most effective way of listening to his daughter
pour her heart out about life's challenges and
frustrations.
Being
aware of your own preferred listening style and the needs of your
communication partner can help you adopt a listening style that
best suits the situation.
Image Credits:
1. Grael
2. Falbanka
4. Helpcraft
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